


maybe what's good gets a little bit better

by jessnick05



Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-01-28
Updated: 2011-01-28
Packaged: 2017-10-15 03:59:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 922
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/156824
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jessnick05/pseuds/jessnick05
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>On the plane back to LA she tries to rearrange all her memories into something that makes sense.</p>
            </blockquote>





	maybe what's good gets a little bit better

**Author's Note:**

> First thing I've written in 8 or 9 years and unbeta'ed so any comments/critique welcome (I can take it, honest!).
> 
> eta: Title is from the lyrics to the song "It Goes Like It Goes", by David Shire and Norman Gimbel.

When Mary is fourteen, Dad calls to check up on her.

He asks her how she’s doing in school and when she tells him she’s getting C’s he lectures her for awhile about "wasting her intelligence". He says something about always being smarter than her age, does she remember the books they read together when she was younger? She lies and says no. Dad doesn’t get to bring up nice things he did when she was little to try and get her to do stuff now.

Why should she have to do anything he says anyways, just because he pays for her school and sends her spending money once in awhile? He hasn’t called her in 8 months.

She tells him she’s going to the school dance with an 18 year old boy, which is a lie, he’s only 15 but she knows it will make her Dad angry and she wants him to feel as angry as she always does.

He yells at her, says she can’t go (who’s he kidding?) but when she stays quiet he stops. Tells her he’s sending her $50, don’t spend it on clothes or makeup, start saving some of the money he sends her.

He says he loves her and she hangs up. She knows that’s a lie.

***

On the plane back to LA she tries to rearrange all her memories into something that makes sense. So the cold-hearted bastard of a father who fucked up her life is actually an overly protective father who cared about her. Her life got fucked up either way. Her past doesn't suck any less just because Dad loved her.

The facts are the same - shipped to the mainland and surrounded by beaches and blue skies and tan bodies that were almost but not quite right, no home, father gone, brother lost for years, no one to help her hold on to the fading memories of her mother.

All that’s changed is she’s lost the righteous anger that fed her and the sorrow she’s avoided for years is seeping into its place.

She should really be even angrier at Dad now.

***

When Mary is nineteen, a cop shows up at the apartment looking for Rick - her idiot boyfriend who imagines he’s a shady, badass character but mainly smokes a lot of pot and makes promises he can’t deliver. She could do better, she knows, but also a hell of a lot worse, and he knows she loves shrimp lo mein and Newcastle and always laughs like he means it.

She mouths off to the cop somehow and then he’s inviting her to the station for a chat. He asks her questions about Rick. Where was he Tuesday afternoon? Has anyone been by the apartment lately? Does she know where he hangs out? She tells him the truth and thinks he’s actually bummed she’s not giving him a hard time anymore. He also seems like a bit of a meathead.

When he gets called out of the room and leaves his notes on the table, she revises to definitely a meathead. She has a fleeting thought that Dad would be reaming this cop a new asshole but proud of Mary for decoding his scribbles (but reaming her for all her bad life choices too, of course). She can’t quite figure out all the notes, but gets enough to realize that Rick really is shady.

He’s still not a badass though.

***

She talks to Steve at least once a week now. He tells her about the waves at Waimea yesterday, the new tile he’s installing in the kitchen, the disastrous attempt at a Five-0 outing to Wa`ahila Ridge.

He feeds her some bullshit about the latest case he’s working on - no gunfights, no casualties, everything tied up neatly in a bow and handcuffs with no bruises or property damage. Steve can’t possibly think she’s that damn stupid; though maybe he does because he still has no idea she’ll just get the real story from Kono later.

They don’t talk about Dad or yakuza bad guys or coming home.

She thinks about arguing with him or just showing up at his front door. Nothing stopping them from finding her in LA and there’s no Steve or Five-0 to rescue her here. But Steve is just stupidly protective enough to make her go into witness protection or something equally ridiculous, so she keeps her mouth shut.

Steve always says "love you, kiddo" and she says "you too" and thinks okay, maybe not totally fucked up.

She got Steve back. And her home. Dad eventually left her some truths, and a toolbox. Maybe she can forgive him the rest.

***

When Mary turns eight, Dad starts reading to her every night. Not in her bedroom reading her to sleep or anything, she’s not a baby, but in the living room after dinner. Steve is never there. Dad says he doesn’t have the patience and Steve does seem to run around a lot. Mary is glad that it’s just her and Dad.

She doesn’t always understand all the words but loves the sound of Dad’s voice. Dad likes to ask her questions sometimes and seems happy that she likes Sherlock Holmes. That and Oliver Twist are her favorites, only because she loves Oliver (she doesn’t understand why everyone else seems so cold and poor and mean).

Mom always brings milk and cookies afterwards, and kisses Dad on the cheek, then takes Mary up to bed where Dad’s voice is still running through her head.

END


End file.
